Monday, July 6, 2009

homesick

I would just like to share this one song that simply breaks my heart every time I hear it...


You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times
And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you
But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry
Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways
The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know
But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same
Cause I'm still here so far away from home

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

In Christ, there are no goodbye
And in Christ, there is no end
So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have
To see you again
To see you again

And I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

*************************************************************************

yes, I am sooo homesick, because if home is where the heart is...my heart is with Floren, it will always stay with Floren. And now that he is not here, my heart feels lost.

We arrived last July 3, 11:30PM Manila time at the NAIA with Floren's remains. I cried when we boarded Emirates flight 334...because in the past, Floren and I had always looked forward to the day when we will be going home to the Philippines and have our first plane ride together too. Ironic that it was our first and last ride together..with me sitting in the business class section and he, in the cargo section..ouch!

When I stepped out of NAIA, I cried. I was home at last...but where is home? Home is with Floren and Kz.... the pain....

I miss him so much... oh the pains of a young widow who people look up to as strong and from that strength , they find comfort. If only they could see the hollowness of my heart, my other half (literally and emotionally and physically and spiritually) is gone.

Here in our Dasma, Cavite house, I still feel safe, because I still see his body. I don't know what's next.

All I know that God loves me and He has wonderful plans for me... And I am always looking forward to that day when Floren and I will finally be together, in our home in heaven...


2 comments:

Carms said...

hi noelle I will pray for you and baby. miss u.hope to see you soon. God is with you noelle.

Carms said...

Take care noelle and God bless I'm here for you.

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